You should look at jQuery.noConflict(). Use this jQuery method in your JS to avoid conflicts with WFFM included jQuery libs

You should look at jQuery.noConflict(). Use this jQuery method in your JS to avoid conflicts with WFFM included jQuery libs

UPDATE:

In response to your updated question: no, there is no way to tell WFFM not to use jQuery, but because jQuery registers itself as an AMD module, you should be able to check to see if jQuery is already on the page before you call jQuery.noConflict(). You can do this using the following code:

if (typeof window.jQuery != 'undefined') {
    // now call noConflict and any other logic
} 

You will likely want to run that script in a $(window).load(...) handler